Yesterday evening, I stepped out of the house to find that one among the dozen-ish birds perched upon the pole wires above had decided to leave its legacy on the ass of my car.
I looked up at the bunch of stupid flying things, cursing whichever one had released its large, unholy splatter of white and purple.
All these damn birds had wings that enabled them to fly above the rest of the world, to see the lands from a perspective those without wings could not,
yet it was here, of all places, that they had chosen to seat themselves.
"But what right did I have to mutter indecencies at them?", I ask myself now.
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When despair at last floods your heart,
you will fall to your knees and look to the heavens with tears in your eyes,
screaming in voiceless agony, "What have I done to deserve this?"
and the voice that you've always prayed would respond to your sorrow
will still prefer to remain silent.
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You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: 你快講話阿
Stranger: 我沒梗了
You: no english?
Stranger: 你會講中文嗎?
You: hmm..
You: this seems like a problem
Stranger: 什麼阿
Stranger: 搞屁阿
Stranger: 到底想怎樣阿
You: ..I'm afraid I can't understand
You: What country are you from?
Stranger: 中國
Stranger: 你看得懂嗎,傻逼
You: hmm.. I wonder
You: 1 for korea
2 for Japan
3 for China
4 for Taiwan
5 for Other
Stranger: 1
You: Aaaah
You: So you can understand what I'm saying.. 1 for yes, 2 for no
Stranger: 1
You: I wonder why I can't read your text
You: How disappointing..
Stranger: because you're too stupid......
You: lmfao
You: Ah, this conversation's taken a nice twist
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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